I was never a fantastic student.
I wasn’t a bad one.
I kind of sat on upper middle ground.
Like all kids, some subjects were better than others. Rocked tourism and drama but maths certainly was not my forte.
In year 10 I had a great teacher maths teacher, Mr Keane and I actually absorbed some of the
boring crap mathematical knowledge he was dishing out. Honestly it was without really trying but it was soaking in. So much so I got an A on my test.
An A! I couldn’t believe it.
Unfortunately neither could Mr Keane and he accused of cheating.
I hadn’t cheated. I majorly fluked it! But hadn’t cheated. Somewhere in my mind his teachings where sticking but now he was accusing me of cheating which I read as he believed that there was no possible way that I was smart enough to get that score.
I was made to re-sit the test.
This is where some may have revelled in proving him wrong. Going forth and kicking ass on the same test again. Boosting power from the situation.
And stared at Mr Keane for 45 minutes.
How dare he accuse me of cheating! He could stick his test firmly…
I failed, of course and the exercise scrapped all the positivity I thought of him and his lessons after that. I was probably lucky I didn’t have him has a math teacher for my senior years.
My stubbornness was always a problem as a child.
I remember being told by my ballet teacher to take my earrings out. I liked novelty earrings (yep, I owned some wooden parrots) but the ones I was wearing that day weren’t a massive pair but little ballerinas don’t wear jewellery.
The teacher who was telling me just happened to be a passionate jewellery wearer herself and was actually known for her big hoop earrings.
So I told her, I will take my earrings out if you take yours out. Which may have moved to a, why should I have to take mine out when you don’t.
I spent that ballet lesson sitting outside the door. Probably my one and only time doing so mind you. I wasn’t naughty just stubborn.
Ok maybe a bit cheeky too (I have a lot of that in me) but definitely stubborn.
With age my stubbornness continues to be a big part of my personality, I have just learnt how to control it better. But when things happen like, not getting something I really wanted or if I feel like I am missing out (not great for a FOMO) I have to start back chatting that little Alf Stewart in my head throwing his arms up and storming out calling “Flaming Galahs!” behind me.
I don’t want to be like that and deep down I’m not. Stubbornness is just like self-esteem and probably just a part of it. You psychologists out there can correct me on that one. You have to work on it being a positive otherwise it just drags you down.
The top three ways I combat my stubbornness:
- Mentally step away from the situation for a breather. Stop talking! Doing this allows you to bring back down to size whatever is going on. Mountains/mole hills etc. You know the drill.
- Take a break. Leave whatever it is you are doing for a day or two. It will still be there when you get back most likely and when you do you will have a completely different frame of mind.
- Point out to myself all the good stuff. Make a list of all the awesome things in your life or the successes that you have had or even draw a picture of the amazing pasta dish you demolished the night before. Basically anything that helps transition you from the negative to the positive.
Obviously it is very dependent on the situation. If I am not getting what someone is drawing over and over again in Pictionary I don’t grab a note pad and start writing down things like kittens, soft cushions and my loving family.
But say, if something is making me want to throw in the blogging towel these are my go to actions and they help to give me a slap around the ears to wake up to myself.
I don’t think stubbornness is all negative though and is much more an internal battle than external.
My stubbornness allows me to enjoy a great debate. I think it is so fun. Some people hate that but a debate on something small and meaningless over a bottle of wine is one of my funnest things to do.
Thank goodness we all grow up and out of our childish ways.
I am still a really shit looser though I just don’t go running to my room crying…
Most of the time.