I have just come off of two weeks flying solo with the kids during school holidays…
There is not much chance for me time in there.
I get that some people are single parents, others (like me) do the FIFO lifestyle and some row their boat without much crew so “me time” is a precious entity.
Last week’s Mummy Souls Session I encouraged you into petty theft, to steal time to meditate. This week I am pushing you to do the same but on a bigger level.
Nope, no, get out of the cupboard, try as you might, the kid’s will find you anyway! Stealing a day when you are solo parenting is not going to happen.
You actually aren’t technically stealing anything from anyone. It is taking something that you would love to be doing, flipping it on its head and getting everyone in on the act.
Grab a piece of paper and a pen or print off this “What Do You Want To Do Today?” list I have created for you and without thinking too hard about it jot down a few things that you would love to be doing today for yourself.
As parents (or even non-parents get this) we are always thinking of somebody else. What will make them happy? What would they like to do today? What we can try to do is incorporate something that you would like to be doing into an activity that you can take the kids along too and that they will enjoy. What do you want to do today?
Yes, this completely wouldn’t work if you wrote down anything about massages, facials and the like. But with a little bit of creativity, you can transform things like read a magazine, chill out by the pool, go out for drinks with the girls (as long as you don’t plan crawling home with a broken heel) into a win win for all.
Here are some examples from my list:
- I want to sit back and read a magazine to myself… Take the kids to your local library. The selection of magazines will be off the charts and you may just discover a new favourite. For the kids, there is often free activities taking place, game stations or even just a big screen TV which the staff will happily change for you if majority rules. Sit back and get comfy, it isn’t a child minding service but there is a tonne of things to keep everyone occupied for a little while.
- I want to catch up with some girlfriends… Maybe it isn’t your favourite cafe but many pubs and clubs have excellent playgrounds or games rooms these days as well has good food. Gastropub anyone? Google around in your local area and you are bound to find your local that will keep everyone happy and give you and your girlfriends catch up time over a good meal out.
- I want to get back to nature to ground myself… This one is simple, pack the car and go. It seems like such a hassle but it really isn’t once it’s done. There is so much fun to be had by all you will most certainly get time to dig your toes into the sand and a moment to yourself at the beach. A bushwalk gets everyone quiet, because they are mostly out of breath, so you can hear the nature around you. Or if that is all just too hard take your shoes off and get everyone barefoot in the backyard. Water table, sand pit, trampolines, they are most likely in your backyard for good reason, use them!
- I want to listen to music loud and dance around… This is one of my most favourite things to do. My family loves a good evening dance-off but sometimes I just want my music with all the profanities. Once the kids go to sleep grab your headphones and iPod (my set up is here) and play it all. If you are feeling very odd, turn off the lights. Dance like no-one is watching…because they’re not.
- I want to nap… Drink more tea. See I don’t have an answer for everything!
So grab that list and have a think, how can you incorporate a mummy soul session into a family activity when that solo “me time” just isn’t going to happen. Just mentally telling yourself that this is how your “me time” is going roll today will make you feel better doing an incorporated activity. It is very different saying “I am going to read some magazines in a comfy chair” to “I am taking the kids to the library” but really it can be the same thing.
Enjoy your “me time” even if it is with everyone else!
What is on your “What do you want to do today?” list? Stuck? Try me for a “me time” flip in the comments below.